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Jul 26, 2004
thinkum
So this is like an alien landscape to me at the moment, because it's been so long since I've actually blogged.
Baaad llama. Bad.
Anyway, since I harped on the bell to blog I suppose I'm obliged to follow my own counsel. (Not that I mind.)
CIY was a jaw dropper. It was also an answer to prayer in alot of ways, just because I was able to become alot closer to the people at ACC. I really really love them and I'm a little frustrated at not being able to be full time there, but at the same time I know that I'm called to be doing just what I'm doing for the time being. I am, however, joining Jeff and Emily's well group. Gotta keep buff ; ) Also, I was granted some vindication...some lies that had been told about me were exposed. Thank God for His justice.
In other news, I was stopped twice in two days, with an expired license, unregistered tags that were on my old car, and no registration. Haha. Praise Jesus. No ticket. (That's not even mentioning the speeding and the stop-sign rolling through.) The Lord's been convicting me about my driving, though.
Phil Chalmers said something at CIY that's been looping through my head. He said
"It's time to grow up". Sometimes I think I'm like an ostrich with it's head in the sand. And it's time, at least spiritually.
I'm sitting here, thinking about how much I'm looking forward to scrap-booking with Kelsey.
Also thinking I need to get organized. I miss my laptop. Time to pray for provision. Soon I'll be done with bluegreen. I'll be fulltime theatre and I can re-evaluate my focus and direction. I really just need to get ahead and have a plan. I just typed "I'm bad at plans"
Today I checked out 8 CD's from the library of music from different countries around the world. That thrills and excites me. I also bought this little gourd instrument from TJ's. I'm going to start collecting exotic instruments for when I have my own place. And when I do, I'm going to have a music room/library.
Also must say how much I enjoyed actually spending some time with my mother and sister.
Well. This was...pink.
Posted at 01:53 pm by wonderwild
Jul 1, 2004
It's my birthday, I can write if I want to
Huzzah! Let there be rejoicing! My birthday is finally here. (My 21st, no less) Thus far, my day has been delightful, except for me being here at work, presently. But I woke up to my floor being filled and I mean filled with balloons, piled nose high with my bed. Red and white, too. They were all courtesy of Fernie the amazing hot-air machine. I was impressed. Also, there was a pink and creme rose waiting for me and then...mom made a fantastic display of breakfast, complete with low fat hashbrowns, low fat cinnamon rolls, and egg beaters. Then, they surprised me with breakfast presents. A big box of hand picked Godiva chocolates, my favorite flavors. A box of yummy soaps monogramed with M and a magnificent Waterman pen (As mom calls it "A 'write' of passage"). How spoiled can one girl be? Plus, Fern gave me $40 to spend shopping, along with a beautiful letter and card....what an extravagant gift! G'ma sent me $20 and I haven't seen the mail from the rest of today, yet. Then we went shopping, as M&D had also given me a $100 shopping budget. I spent $72 on one pair of Jeans...outrageous! We'll see. Perhaps I'll take them back and shop more. Perhaps I'll keep them. We'll see. But I also got a skirt, a jacket, a pair of shorts, 3 shirts, undies, victoria's secret laundry detergent. Luxe, ehhh?! The girls at work lavished on me flowers and rice krispie treats, which I can have because they're low fat. And low fat is good, especially since I made it to my birthday goal. Now only a little bit more to go.
So, Birthday salutations to me.
Posted at 05:34 pm by wonderwild
Jun 24, 2004
Than you think
Jordan said something great to me, the other day, as I was adding more miles to my well-worn soapbox. We were talking about God and time and mercy and he said;
"God is even better than you think".
It's stuck with me as I plow through my tempestuous schedule, that in everything, as impressed as I am with the grandeur of my vision, God is even greater than I think. Jordan's been especially lovely, lately. Hoosta, Jordan.
On my mind...pray for the people around us. I don't do it enough. I think of my natural tendancy to try and fight everyone's battles, and then so decidedly neglect the to fight the fight that really makes the difference.
Also trying to get a handle on what to do to break children's church out of it's rut. I think I'll call Alyssa. These kids don't know it yet, but there's big things in store for them. I pray God uses me to be the vessel responsible for great seed in their lives.
Had a chance two nights ago to talk to the girls in the office about the Lord. I feel sometimes, like I'm too tactful, too careful about not foisting my faith on people. But praise Jesus, the subject came up and the Lord used me. Thank heaven for obedience. I've been thinking about obedience with a different twist these days, as in....obedience as a gift to us. We have the gift of being able to obey. It's like having the key to a treasure chest, because blessings follow obedience. Like Abraham; God asked him to give up his only son, the son that God gave him. Abraham obeyed and God multiplied him.
One week, today, until my birthday. Not sure what the plan is, yet. Blah. Well, I'm at work early. Packing in the hours. But I have two other pages to post to, among other things, like....you know, work. So, more when there's more.
Hobby of the moment: Relativity/light/sound/worm-hole research. It's all interconnected and I'm hooked.
Music: Apoptygma Berserk "Glimpse of History"
Posted at 02:11 pm by wonderwild
Jun 16, 2004
Well, because, that's why!
Jesse Duplantis was at Word Alive, last night and I went. That's become one of the best points of my year. Plus, it's only 3 weeks until CIY and only 2 until my birthday. I still haven't decided what I'm going to do. I was thinking maybe Chicago, but I think the money is better spent on Fl. (Unless we maybe make it a day trip) or possibly shopping or...I don't know. Something. I have to say that I'm very proud of Kelsey Bell for getting her license. Shouts and snaps and spoons.
I'm going to the movies here momentarily. It's a nice post-work let down. But I'm not doing very well with getting ahead, this week. I need to remedy that. Tomorrow I must make many many lists. Also, I've learned how to do AS400's at work. Self-assumed responsibility. Motivated, self starter. Inititive. I'm building bridges.
Oh. I registered for school, today. It appears that I'll be taking american history and world lit II. I didn't get to speak to my advisor who is Carol Schuck, head of english at Vincennes University, so I was worried at first about the world lit course, concerned that it was too...ehhh...floofy(Okay, but I'm an english major) and it's the only 200 level that I'm taking. BUT, then, I found out that Mrs. Schuck is the instructor for WLII. So...I'm guessing it was a wise move, weedhopper. I'm taking all my classes downtown, a place where the potties were so yukie I couldn't even ...potty. Well, but that was only in the old building, not the technical building where I'll be taking courses. The tcb is new. «Hoosta» for new. So yay for me. Classes start in August. Must remember the breathing. Okay, good for now. Gonna go see a movie and divert my chaotic mind.
Posted at 09:39 pm by wonderwild
Jun 14, 2004
Suddenly like that
I'm at the library and my time on the computer will expire soon, but I haven't been here in a while and sometimes this feels like breathing to me, the deep breath kind that fills your lungs with refreshing life. This last week was madness, teaching in the morning and work to follow. This week I don't have theatre, but I will again next week. I'm appreciative of the breather, although I'd rather be working. Note to self, get everything done this week so I can feel ahead of the game next week. So, yesterday, Sunday...church. And Jesse. Suffice it to say and interesting introduction and a good day. The enemy tried to ruin it for me, but that Jesus for grace. My special music went well and children's church as well. I got the stamp of approval for going ahead with a money raising service for the kids. Also am now meeting alot of new people in the church who are devoted to helping with the ministry, both the set up and the follow through. Especially and including Kelsey's art teather Jan...she's a dear lady. Her husband Jack is also quite the dandy!
The music right now is Joy Williams "How Deep the Father's Love"
"How deep the Father's love for us, how vast and without measure. That He would give His only Son to make a wretch His treasure"
I'm almost out of time, so I'll write more later.
Posted at 01:32 pm by wonderwild
Jun 2, 2004
it calls for redemption
I just deleted such a very long entry. *waaaaah* (<------- it's my blog, I can cry if I want to!)
In brief, I stated that today seemed brilliantly productive. I have done much in the way of gathering information and also vacation planning. I bought our tickets yesterday. This vacation is a source of great joy for me, and gratitude to the Lord for providing a way. I'm going to re-join the YMCA tomorrow. I'm really thrilled about it. It's time to step up my healthy living. I'm also determined to go as totally organic as possible. That's one of the things I like best about myself, is my pursuit of healthiness. I feel like it glorifies the Lord. Everything is coming together in life. I am so thankful. Despite the madness and blur of each passing day, God's grace has been helping me savor each moment...hmm...while still having great things to look forward to.
Speaking of great things, I had a great testimony the other day. Last August, I lost the cross necklace my grandmother gave me. That necklace represents alot of emotional and spiritual significance for me and so I was devastated to not be able to find it. I knew I had taken it to New York and the last I remembered seeing it was the day before Jordan came. I had put it up on a shelf above the shower. Then I know I cleaned like mad and of course, was busy with thoughts of his impending visit etc. Well, once I noticed that it was missing, I searched high and low for it to no avail. I assumed it'd been eaten by the vacuum or possible down the drain or something. So, here recently, I'd been thinking of it and how sad it made me that it was gone. Well, Monday, Kate and I were at the mall and I stopped at one of those kiosks that sell jewelry to look at crosses. I saw one that I really liked and probably would have bought it but the sales lady rudely ignored me, so we left. As we left, I told the Lord about my necklace and how I felt. Well...the next day, while I was binge-cleaning (binge-cleaning v. unnecessary cleaning brought on by sudden inexplicable urges) I was going through boxes that I never look in....and I found the necklace. Now, every time I see it, I think of how much the Lord loves me, that He brought it to me when I was wishing for it....that even a little thing like that was important to Him!
I also have a new idea....I'm considering what it would take to go into life consulting. By that I mean ...well, something akin to queer eye for the straight guy, for women and without lesbians. do image consulting on a budget, help organize the messy points in womens lives. help them cultivate new hobbies/interests/talents. Impress some culture/manners/deportment....you know, things like how to eat chicken in a restaurant, who Charles Dickens is (Since some of my deal girl friends didn't even know...) walking, voice...stuff like that. Just to help women be classic, confident and inspired. Like Linda says "help them wear their femminity like diamonds" It's still just an idea, but it's one I'm quite taken with.
Well....now this entry, or rather re-entry was longer than the original. Funny. I think I'll leave "work" and call Jordan on my way home. Silly boy.
Posted at 09:46 pm by wonderwild
May 31, 2004
flight of the bumblemanda.
I am feeling overwhelmed. I am wishing I could bargain with the sun for an hour or two more, to accomplish these things that so quickly backlog in the "urgent and not yet done" pile. A random list of said things include (but are not limited to) Working on the room for children's church, preparing the lesson, working on the lesson for next week's DOE meeting, blogging on Eden, fliers upon fliers for StarKids, library errands, ticket buying, fund-raising, license-place procuring, posting on E-2, laundry, losing 30 lbs, cleaning out my car, hanging out with Kelsey, the StarKids staff meeting, keeping my focus right, taking a shower, for heaven's sake.....
*pant pant pant*
And that's just this week. Next week I start teaching Summer camps in the morning and so it will truly be 24/7 non-stop madness. Saints! It's time to lift up some serious supplication! I been supplicatin' all day! : )
In other news, my first Sunday as *ahem* "children's minster" went, in my oppinion, exceedingly well. They're a swell bunch of kids, they really are. Even the problem child has a heart of hyper-active gold. I'm guessing I'll have more trouble from let us call her Jezebell, uber-snob. Pray, pray, pray. Today, Kate and I went to the Christian bookstore and ooooooh, I could have spent so much money on the prettyshineys
(prettyshiney n. "prÈTTyshÎNey" An object or person of current interest, interchangeable and often distracting. manda's new world dictionary.)
Is it any wonder I've been singing broadway?
The music is, however "Famous One" by ...I think...Chris Tomlin. mmm,yes.
aaah, I feel better. That was good.
Posted at 08:25 pm by wonderwild
May 28, 2004
rank and unproductive memoirs
Eeeh, so, today was vastly unproductive.
Hmm, I shouldn't say totally, because mum and I had our ritual luncheon at Oakley's. The second time around did not dissapoint. And I did find some things to buy. Yay for buying things. My particular favorite is a necklace I found at global gifts (a store I'm relatively certain Miss Bell would love) It's a huge cluster of red beads. It came from Indonesia. Global Gifts is a store that works with the Fair Trade Organization, making it possible for people to make a better income in poverty stricken countries. I always love buying things there for that reason.
In other news, I went to NLAG tonight, after work, to try to clean. Imagine, I, unsuspectingly opening the vacuum door, at which point I was violently swooped down upon by a hiddeous and hyper BAT!
I didn't finally clean, after all. Heh. Ooooh terminex...
In two minutes it will be Fernie's birthday. Happy Birthday, Fernie.
Oh, one productive thing...I got some stuff accomplished for DOE! Huzzah!
Today felt restless and the music was loud.
Posted at 11:56 pm by wonderwild
May 26, 2004
ping-pong post-it
Such a day this has been!
To recount, by number....First, having spoken with Pastor J and Cathleen, I have been officially invited to be children's pastor for their church. I'm dizzy with the possibilities. Children's choirs, outreaches, etcetc.....(to the extent that I went straight to the Christian bookstore to find books and supplies....school-ish supplies, no less. Could I be more excited?) Ehm, and there's things to handle, as well....what to do about ACC? However, the news came the same day they released the loan money in the bank. And I'll be paid the same amount as the payment. (this is scattered, but I offer no appology) Second, I've done things to my hair. I always knew I was like Anne of Green Gables. (if that was not cryptic to you, I know you are a kindred soul, indeed.) Third....I can't remember third, but I do know I have to be up early and I have a full...ehm...year...ahead of me, and in light of that, I choose to sleep.
Music: Everything's Coming Up Roses...
Posted at 12:26 am by wonderwild
May 24, 2004
A tribute to Atlas
My mother is my hero. She is everything I want to be. I watch her and I understand that, unlike some role models and heros, she doesn't aspire to see her name in lights. Rather, she becomes light to the people around her. My mother can do anything, she performs miracles on a regular basis, through faith in Christ, talent and love. It is without an undue sense of self that she pours herself out and becomes vast, like the ocean, deep and familiar, with secrets and stories to tell. Like seashells, pressed to my ear, I hear her voice in my mind, guiding me, my champion in the darkness, and my ancient-wise counselor in my many insecurities. I don't think she sees herself like I see her; A rarefied form of Christ's love, strong, brave, and wise. It is probable that I don't express to her in ways that would certify she understands....I'm proud and I'm blessed to know her, to be her daughter. Without her, I would not dream in color, I would not dare to try and I would not determine to succeed. Above all, having taught me that my weaknesses need not define me, she has loved me, even when they have. She is spectacular and excellent and beautiful. She is the dearest face I know. And unlike some role models and heroes, with their names in lights, who live in a distant constellation, I am priviledged because I know her and by knowing her,
I love her.
Posted at 10:04 am by wonderwild
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